I’m still on partial leave from the blog until October, but I wanted to write SOMETHING. So recently I suffered through Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) and I was going to write a long rant about this movie, but a song (with some minor alterations) sums it up so well.
I miss you more than Michael Bay missed the mark
When he made TMNT
I miss you more than that movie missed the point
And that’s an awful lot Laird
And now, now you’ve gone away
And all I’m trying to say is
TMNT sucked, and I miss you
I need you like Megan Fox needs acting school
She was terrible in that film
I need you like Whoopi Goldberg needed a bigger part
She’s way better than Megan Fox
And now all I can think about is your comic
and that shitty movie too
TMNT sucked and I miss you
Why does Michael Bay get to keep on making movies?
I guess TMNT sucked
Just a little bit more than I miss you.
Seriously, Peter Laird. Why… *sobs*